


Shatter Me with Hope

by PadawanRyan



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Abandoned Work - Unfinished and Discontinued, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, M/M, Takes Place Between ANH and TESB
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2010-10-24
Updated: 2010-11-06
Packaged: 2021-03-01 18:33:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 6,561
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23931610
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PadawanRyan/pseuds/PadawanRyan
Summary: Xanatos is transported through the Force into the future, feeling a bitter anger in his soul. Luke Skywalker thinks he can help him, but can he really?
Relationships: Luke Skywalker & Xanatos, Wedge Antilles/Luke Skywalker





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> **Title: Shatter Me with Hope.**
> 
> **Pairing: Luke/Wedge. Luke/?...Slash.**
> 
> **Rating: T, may later become an M.**
> 
> **Summary: Xanatos is transported through the Force into the future, feeling a bitter anger in his soul. Luke Skywalker thinks he can help him, but can he really?**
> 
> **Disclaimer: I do not own the characters, or parts of the story. They belong to George Lucas, regardless of how much I'd like to own Luke Skywalker. Haha.**
> 
> **Author's Note: This came to me today, and I didn't even know how to put it through, but I'm gonna damn well try. I've lately come into this interest in Xanatos, Qui-Gon Jinn's padawan before Obi-Wan, but I didn't think I could stick to writing a chaptered fic that wasn't Luke/Wedge. So I've decided to throw in a little accidental time travel, and bada boom, this is the result! I'm putting this under the characters of Xanatos and Luke, purely because the story does mainly deal with Xanatos, though there is a large amount of attention paid to Luke as well. So kudos to anyone who actually managed to find this, I'm sorry I had to throw it in a character pairing that has NO other fics on the site!**

"Kenobi..."

The name went through his mind like a gust of wind, as he opened his eyes to see where he was. Xanatos was unsure of what had happened, why he was suddenly engulfed by an unnatural onslaught of the Force and knocked unconscious. The last thing he remembered were feelings of betrayal - not the same betrayal he had felt when his former master, Qui-Gon Jinn, had killed his father...but something entirely different. He had once felt Qui-Gon as a father as well, and tried to quash those feelings when he had ultimately turned to the dark side of the Force, but they seemed to be surfacing again. All because of one young boy.

"Kenobi..."

He had been replaced, and that hurt in a way he was unsure he could even feel anymore. Qui-Gon had severed their bond when he had chosen his father's place above his master's, many years ago, but that pained him just as much as the death of his father. It seemed that in the end, Qui-Gon hadn't really cared for him after all, and after he had felt like a son to the man! Then of course, he goes and picks a new padawan, a new son to care for...when Xanatos saw them together on Bandomeer, it nearly broke him, his anger radiating off of him in waves. He had barely had the chance to take action, though, before the Force intervened.

"Where...?"

Looking around, all he could see for miles was snow. It occurred to him in that moment how cold he actually was, wearing nothing but thin clothing beneath his dark robe. He had seen cold places like this on missions with Qui-Gon as a teenaged padawan, but it didn't make any sense - how had he been transported here from Bandomeer? The Force was certainly working in it's own way, and Xanatos wanted to figure out why, but the freezing wind that nipped at him had him thoroughly distracted. Picking himself up to stand, he attempted to look around better, but as before, all he saw was snow. Was this the Force's way of killing him, before Qui-Gon would have the chance? Thinking of his former master brought back his thoughts about the boy, the young padawan.

"Kenobi..."

Had the Force just transported him to another planet? Another dimension? Another time? He had absolutely no idea, and it seemed that there was nobody around to ask about it. He began to take steps, slowly and cautiously through the freezing white substance on the ground, feeling as if he were going to collapse at any moment. He was twenty-eight years old, and perfectly fit, but his body was certainly not used to trudging around in the snow. It wasn't long before his breaths became pants, and he felt himself falling forward into the snow, unable to move any longer. As consciousness slipped from him, his anger dissipated, but one thing remained on his mind.

"Kenobi..."

/

"Echo Base, this is Rogue Leader. I don't see anything out here yet."

Flying his X-wing fighter above the snow in his air patrol, first air patrol since the Rebel Alliance had decided to set up their base on this desolate freezing planet, Luke Skywalker scanned his horizons. This would be an activity that many would have to endure, in the air or on the land, to keep certain that there were no creatures or Imperials around to hinder their progress. It wasn't Luke's ideal day to spend hours flying over the snow, looking for lifeforms, when in fact he'd rather have remained in his shared room with his lover, making up for lost time. The Alliance had been busy with their changing of bases, and he barely got any alone time with the beloved anymore.

"Copy that, Rogue Leader. You can return to Echo Base now."

Breathing a sigh of relief, Luke flew high over an elevated mound of snow - nothing high enough to be considered a genuine mountain, though - and turned back in the direction of the base. In less than a standard hour, he would luckily get the chance to curl up in bed with his partner, warm up and talk about their dreams and expectations. That was one of his favourite activities - just talking about his dreams for the future. Luke had never imagined anything other than being a pilot, though, so it was difficult to think of being anything but. The blond pilot was pulled out of his thoughts when he saw a dark spot in the white snow below.

"Echo Base, this is Rogue Leader. I see something below me, certain it's a lifeform. I'm gonna check it out."

Swerving down in what could be considering a U-turn, Luke parked his fighter among a mound of snow, keeping the controls on in case he needed to make a quick getaway. As well, it wouldn't harm the X-wing to remain warmed up, out in the snow. Climbing out, Luke could see the lifeform better, and it was most definitely a human. He ran toward it as fast as his flight suit and many layers would allow, and dropped down beside the being. It took only a small bit of energy to turn the person over, and he could see that it was a man - young, but still older than him. There was no doubt that the man had been there a while, his Force signature even seemed frozen.

"Oh my..."

Luke's words trailed off, as he realized how strong a Force signature this man had. Even if he wasn't trained as the Jedi he someday hoped to become, he felt something from this man. The raven hair beneath the hook of his cloak had turned to ice, and the man's cheeks were redder than Luke had seen anything, besides blood. His body was stiff, and the blond was tempted to believe it was only the will of the Force that this man hadn't died. How had he even got out there in the first place? The young rebel pilot made to lift the man as carefully as he could, and carry him toward the X-wing, but nearly dropped him when the frozen lips actually parted and spoke.

"Kenobi..."


	2. Chapter One

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, I wrote the beginning to this, and I already have the end planned...now I just need to figure out everything in between! I know this type of fic was certainly not expected by anyone, but that's why I'm proud to write it. I excel in doing the unexpected...well, everything I seem to do at school is expected - always something Star Wars related. But when it comes to basically everything else, I excel in doing the abnormal. Anyway, enjoy!

"How could a person survive out there like that?"

As consciousness returned to him, the first thing that Xanatos was aware of were voices. There were people around him, not doubt talking about him. The second thing he noticed was that he was warm - there was no more snow, but rather warm clothes, and thick blankets. He felt exhausted beyond all belief, and inwardly cursed himself for having trudged through that snow. Obviously, he had done himself no good, and probably would've been better off dying at Qui-Gon's hand. Groaning, he struggled to open his eyes, as it was a particularly strong struggle - his body was definitely not ready to face the world yet. Despite that, he managed to open them slightly.

"Oh, good, you're awake! How do you feel?"

"Fine," he managed to croak out.

Looking at the person who spoke to him, it was fairly clear that he was not a medic, though there appeared to be medics in the room. Getting a better look at the room he was in, he deduced that he was in some sort of medcenter, so someone must have found him in the snow. It barely took a moment before, even in his weakened state, Xanatos felt a Force sensitive in the room. Again, he looked toward the young man who had spoken to him originally - he was blond, probably still several years younger than Xanatos, and appeared to be in good shape. A lightsaber hung at his belt, but he didn't wear a Jedi tunic, nor did Xanatos recognize him.

"Where am I?"

"You're on Hoth," the boy explained, "In the Rebel Alliance's medbay."

"Rebel Alliance?"

"Yeah...are you an Imperial?"

Everything the boy spoke was so confusing, besides the name of the planet - Hoth. He had never been to Hoth before but he had heard of it, and it was just as empty, cold, and desolate as he had heard. What was the Rebel Alliance? Why would they ask if he was an Imperial, what was an Imperial? Perhaps the planet was at war with another, this could've been some small settlement that maybe perhaps was trying to break away from the rest of the planet. He had plenty of theories, but none of them matched the knowledge he had about Hoth, or the wars - large or small - being fought within the galaxy, nothing added up.

His eyes went toward the boy's lightsaber, "Are you a Jedi?"

"I want to be, except...there's none left."

"WHAT?"

That statement brought a sudden unexpected strength to Xanatos, causing him to sit up with his eyes wide, obviously surprising the blond boy who jumped back a bit. There were no Jedi left? Where had the Force sent him? Somehow the boy got the lightsaber, from someone - he couldn't have made it himself, Xanatos can sense that he was mostly untrained. Most padawans didn't learn how to build their own lightsaber until far into their teens, after they'd been trained at the Jedi Temple since infancy, or at least a young age. Xanatos fought to control his breathing, if he wanted information then he couldn't continue to frighten the boy, no matter how good he was at that.

"Yes," he continued, "No Jedi left. Darth Vader killed them all...I saw him kill Ben..."

Ben, that would have to be the name of the boy's master, or at least the Jedi who had given him the lightsaber. This boy didn't look quite like an average padawan, so he doubted he could've had much training if any. So all the Jedi were dead? Darth Vader...clearly a Sith's title, so it seemed the Sith had eliminated the Jedi. Xanatos hadn't known what to feel - he wasn't a Sith, but he didn't seem to follow the light side of the Force anymore, but did he really want the Jedi dead? They had betrayed him...but no, it hadn't been the Jedi themselves who betrayed him, only Qui-Gon, who killed his father and replaced him with the kid.

"You've got to be a Jedi, too...or at least like me."

"How do you figure?"

The boy picked up the lightsaber beside the bed, "This?"

"Oh...well, I _was_ a Jedi once."

Not that it was entirely the truth, he was a padawan once but he had never made it to knighthood. He figured that the boy wouldn't understand if he were to attempt to explain it, so he left it at that. At least his lightsaber had survived the cold, though he hadn't the chance to test it since he'd only woken up. It was a good thing, too - this boy seemed to radiate light throughout his Force signature, and Xanatos' red lightsaber may only alert the boy of a possible Sith. Feeling suddenly week, Xanatos leaned back against the bed again, noticing his black hair fall limply against his shoulders as he did so. The blond got closer, his fear of the man having dissipated.

"Have you got a name? Mine's Luke."

"Xanatos."

The boy's name was short, plain, and fit the boy perfectly - the meaning of Luke was light. Whoever named him either had strong expectations and feelings about the boy, or it was just a very weird coincidence. Luke seemed just to nod at hearing Xanatos' name, obviously not recognizing it, or anything like it even. He could tell by the boy's accent that he grew up somewhere in the outer rim, and it didn't matter what time or dimension he was in - the outer rim knew little of anything inside the Republic, including names. Was there even a Republic where he was? He couldn't have travelled to a place that different, could he?

"So," Luke began again, "Mind telling me how you came to be here, on Hoth?"

"I'm asking myself that same question."

"You don't even know how you got here?"

Xanatos shook his head, unsure of whether he should even explain his theory regarding the Force. The boy obviously had an awareness of the Force, he could figure that much out, but would he think Xanatos was insane? To Luke, the raven haired man seemed to be deep in thought, and he had no idea what to make of him. Xanatos was picking up on Luke's thoughts, though the boy probably had no idea - he wasn't shielding, but Xanatos highly doubted that the boy even knew how to shield. Another thought suddenly came to Luke, a memory, from right before he brought the man back to the Alliance base and the medbay.

"When you were unconscious...you spoke a name. Do you remember what is was?"

How could Xanatos have forgotten? He had fallen unconscious in thinking about his anger towards Qui-Gon and Kenobi, so naturally he would continue even when his brain seemed to have been asleep. The anger suddenly came back, as he was thinking of his former master's new padawan. He wanted to kill Qui-Gon for everything he had done, but a small part of him still had feelings for the man who was once like his father. If he wanted revenge, the best way would be to do away with that new padawan of his. Kenobi was the center of Xanatos' hate at that moment, and it seemed to flow all around him, like an invisible red aura of the dark side.

He nodded and gritted out, "Kenobi."

"I thought it was Kenobi, but I wanted to be sure. Who is he?"

"My...former master's new apprentice."

"I knew a man named Kenobi," Luke stated, "But he was old, not any sort of apprentice. Obi-Wan...I called him Ben."

"Obi-Wan Kenobi?"

There was no mistaking that name, Kenobi's first name was Obi-Wan - he had heard Qui-Gon use it when speaking to the padawan. Luke seemed to have stepped back again, he could clearly tell that Xanatos was angry. So this Ben who Darth Vader had killed, that was Kenobi? Xanatos was unsure of what to think - his plan of revenge had been stolen by another...but if Kenobi had been an old man when Luke knew him, what did that mean? Was Xanatos in the future? It would make sense, sometime between his lifetime and that of Luke's, the Jedi were killed and the Sith had taken over. The thought made Xanatos queasy, and he was unsure of why.

"I think...I'm not from this time."

"How is that possible?"

Xanatos shook his head, "I don't know...the will of the Force, obviously the Force..."

Luke was nodding, though it wasn't clear whether he understood or not. There wouldn't be any other explanation for it, how else would Xanatos have ended up in the future? The Force sent him to that time, that place, for some reason and he wanted to know what it was. His moods seemed to be fluctuating severely, as he was just angry about Kenobi a moment ago and had suddenly become confused regarding the Force...but that was always a problem he had, wasn't it? Apparently whatever he was feeling was affecting Luke in some way, and that also bothered Xanatos for some reason, even though he had barely spoken to the boy.

"In my time...Kenobi was a boy...I was on Bandomeer..."

Though he wasn't entirely sure of whether to trust the man or not, Luke could sense he was telling the truth. If Ben really had been this man's former master's new apprentice, that meant that the time this man was from would be the Galactic Republic. Perhaps he knew his father? No, Luke knew he wouldn't...if Ben was only a boy in his time, then Anakin Skywalker likely would not have been born yet. As he began to think over that, Xanatos had been wondering about the boy standing in front of him. Obviously Luke wasn't trained very well in the Force, and he seemed close to Kenobi...perhaps that revenge he wanted on Kenobi could do on someone else.

"Do you think...could you tell me anything about Ben? I mean, Obi-Wan..."

Xanatos' eyes sparked with a sudden anger as he yelled, "No, and get the Hell out of my sight!"


	3. Chapter Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've actually become really into this fic, everyone ought to just hope I continue writing it. Don't let me be discouraged! I apologize ahead of time for this being shorter than the last chapter, I have spent over twenty-four hours writing this chapter and couldn't get it as perfect as I wanted to, so this is basically the best I could scrimmage up.

"So what's up with that new guy? Wasn't he the one you found?"

It had been a week since Luke had found Xanatos in his patrol, and only a day since the older man had been released from the medbay. Considering the Alliance had no idea who he was - Luke wasn't about to tell them that Xanatos had travelled through the Force into the future, he would sound crazy - they hadn't given him any job, in fear that he would turn out to be an Imperial. Because so, the man had been wandering around the base for the day, having been given a room to sleep in for the night. Luke and Wedge had been sitting together in the dining area when the black haired man had walked in, and when Wedge asked his lover about him.

"Yeah," Luke said, stuffing his mouth, "That's the one."

"Where's he from? Why's he here?"

"I don't know, he wouldn't tell us anything. Besides..."

Although Luke wasn't used to keeping things from Wedge, he couldn't have told him about Xanatos. He wanted to be sure the man wasn't dangerous before saying anything that may put Luke's life on the line. The way Xanatos had gotten angry whenever Kenobi was mentioned, and the way he had screamed at Luke a week ago...it actually scared the blond to an extent. His thoughts were momentarily put aside as he noticed his lover's gaze was occupied by the raven haired former Jedi. It hadn't escaped Luke how attractive Xanatos was - he'd have wanted to try something if he wasn't already committed to someone he actually knew...and loved.

"Besides," he continued, grinning, "You're staring."

"What? I am not staring."

As though to make his point, Wedge turned to Luke and placed a chaste kiss on his lips before watching his food, intent on not looking anywhere toward Xanatos. It didn't escape the blond that his beloved was blushing, but he couldn't blame him. The man was probably a heartbreaker back where he was from. A fleeting thought passed through Luke's mind quickly, on what Wedge thought of Xanatos besides just his looks, but it left almost as quickly as it came. Noticing his lover still watching his food cautiously as he ate, Luke couldn't help but let out a laugh, shaking his head in amusement at the brunette beside him.

"You can look, Wedge. He's hot, I wouldn't blame you."

"He's hot, huh?" It was Wedge's turn to grin, "Should I wonder what you're fantasizing about?"

"Oh, shut it. He's hot, but I'm not stupid enough to give you up."

"Good, because you're mine," the Corellian stated, moving in to kiss his lover again.

/

"Damn kid..."

Sitting in the dining area, though not actually eating anything, Xanatos couldn't figure out who he'd thought of more during the week - Kenobi, or Luke. He didn't even want to refer to the blond in such a personal way like by his first name, especially if he was going to exact his revenge on the boy, but he didn't know his last name. His anger for Kenobi kept running through his head, over and over, and he couldn't stop thinking of ways to make Luke suffer in his spot...but at the same time, it just felt wrong. Was he losing his touch? He was a Dark Jedi, for crying out loud! It didn't escape his attention that the blond was making out with some brunette guy.

"Everyone but me."

As much as he just wanted to be angry, let his anger fuel the Force in him, he couldn't help but feel lonely. His teenage years had been full of different male and female padawans fighting for his attention, and the feeling of being intimate with someone was something he definitely missed. His mind drifted momentarily to Tura, the last woman he'd been intimate with, and how he never planned to see her again...of course, he may never see her again anyway, being trapped for some reason in the future. He was brought suddenly out of his reverie when someone sat down beside him, a man closer to his own age who looked fairly rugged.

"Kay new guy, it's time to stop moping by yourself."

"Did anyone ask you?"

The man looking falsely thoughtful for a moment, "No...but I don't care. I'm Han Solo."

"And I'm _going_ solo."

Xanatos made to stand up, but a hand on his shoulder pulled him back down. He almost growled at the man for doing so, before he realized that it would accomplish nothing to make a scene in the dining area, with everyone watching. He took this moment to get a better look at his companion, if Solo could be called that - he was rugged, but in a handsome sort of way. Not that he was particularly Xanatos' type, but he was certainly attractive regardless. Xanatos really didn't feel like sitting there and listening to him talk, though, so again he attempted to stand. Solo hadn't noticed this time, and the dark haired man was able to do so.

"You're not leaving already?"

"I'm not interested in spending time with some rugged animal."

As the unknown Dark Jedi walked away, he could hear Solo screaming something about not being an animal. Of course, the entire dining area had heard Solo's ranting, and therefore noticed Xanatos - for the first time, when it came to some people. He hadn't even noticed when Luke jumped up to follow him, but he could fear the strong Force presence behind him in the corridor. Finally, when he felt that there was nobody else around but him and the wannabe Jedi, Xanatos turned around, and with a Force-assisted speed, grabbed the boy by the throat and held him up against the wall. Luke seemed beyond shocked at that point.

"Why are you following me?"

Luke was choking as he forced his words out, "I...want...to...t-talk...to...you."

"I don't, and I don't want you near me at all. Got it?"

Luke could only nod in reply, unable to find his voice, and Xanatos let him go, running off before Luke could say anything more. As the blond sat on the floor, massaging his neck, he couldn't get the image out of his mind of the fire in Xanatos' eyes when he attacked him. The man was dangerous, that much was clear, but there was something else tugging at Luke's heart. Xanatos had this horrified look on his face just before he dropped Luke, only for a millisecond or so, as if he couldn't believe he had done something so terrible. Dangerous, he certainly was...but the man also had a heart, and Luke was dead set on reaching that hidden heart.

"Luke? Are you alright?" he could hear Wedge's voice as it entered the hall, "What has the bastard done to you?"


	4. Chapter Three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So the power went out in my whole residence, and the two university residences across the street...so it's probably from this massive wind storm we're having. Anyway, that's why I started this, since I have no TV or internet with a power outage...though this definitely won't be finished during the wind storm (by the time you all read it, that will be long over). A good amount of this was also written while being stranded at the mall for an hour with no internet, so what better way to kill time than to sit and write more of this?

"That damn boy..."

Pacing his room, Xanatos was unsure of what to think or feel. He had this massive urge to destroy Luke, using him to exact his revenge on Kenobi, but at the same time, he felt horrified at the thought of hurting him. Was this the message the Force was sending him, that there was still some weakness from the light side within him? Why else would the Force show him this than to encourage him to squash it? Something didn't feel quite right about that, though, as much as Xanatos didn't want to admit it. There was something about the boy, as if he was the reason the Force sent him there - as if Luke was supposed to be his answer.

"But what _about_ him?"

He was fully aware that he was thinking aloud, but it didn't make a difference since nobody was around to hear him. He had purposely avoided the kid for days, though it wasn't hard considering Luke had his own duties within the Rebel Alliance to tend to. Everybody in the Alliance seemed busy, and Xanatos could only guess that whatever war they were fighting was a serious one. Considering he technically wasn't a member among the rebels, he had little to do besides think and eat, though he did occupy himself by practicing katas with his lightsaber. He was so full of energy since his recovery from the cold, though, and had nothing to do with it.

"This is insanity..."

Everything he thought about was insanity - his everlasting boredom, his current situation, the Force's will, Luke...it was all bound to drive him crazy sometime. Not even thinking in his anger, he whipped his lightsaber backwards toward the door, but the sound he heard wasn't a clang against a metal surface...instead, there was more of a 'thud', followed by a large thumping. Turning around, Xanatos was partially amazed at himself and partially horrified that hed whacked his lightsaber at Luke. He hadn't even heard the door open, but before he could even think about it, he was down at the blond's side, inspecting the bruise he no doubt left on his head.

"Sith, he _had_ to walk in at that moment, didn't he?"

Though his voice portrayed a significant amount of annoyance, Xanatos knew his eyes would betray him. Reaching forward and picking the pilot up, the raven haired man transported the boy to the bed in the far corner of the room, smoothing back his bangs as he did. Luke was unconscious, though pain radiated through his Force presence, and Xanatos was surprised to notice that he actually felt bad for what happened. The man sat by Luke's side for longer than he could recall, waiting for the boy to wake up. He had convinced himself that it was only to be sure he hadn't actually killed him, until Luke's eyes fluttered, and Xanatos' heart nearly stopped.

"W-where am I? What ha-happened?" the blond asked, confused.

"I'm so sorry! You're in my room, I accidentally hit you with my lightsaber..."

"Oh..." Luke's eyes closed again, "That hurt."

/

"It's been hours, Xanatos...and you're still talking to yourself!"

The twenty-eight year old paced his room, wracked with worry and frustration, and still speaking aloud to himself. After Luke had regained consciousness briefly, telling Xanatos that the lightsaber's collision with his head had hurt, he passed back out and wasn't waking up. Xanatos knew that he should've brought Luke to a medic, considering it could be something serious, but he didn't want someone getting the wrong message. What message would that be, though, considering his original intentions involved murdering the boy? He was pacing the room impatiently, not sure of what to even think anymore.

"Come to your senses, Xan...he's just a boy..."

Just a boy, yet the Force had brought him to this boy for some reason. Here was another Force sensitive, basically radiating light, and the last Jedi left in the galaxy...or wannabe Jedi, if he got technical. All of a sudden, he heard a shuffling noise, and quickly turned back toward the bed where it seemed that Luke was shifting around. He didn't appear to be awake yet, but he was definitely not in some sort of coma, which was Xanatos' greatest worry. Dashing toward the bed, and kneeling by the side of the shaking blond, Xanatos attempted to listen to the quiet ramblings that came from the boy's mouth in his unconscious state.

"Ben...no Vader...Ben..."

Sighing, Xanatos pressed a hand to Luke's cheek, "He's gone, Luke."

Although he knew Luke couldn't hear him, he couldn't help but console the boy, as Luke's face had turned to one of fear in his nightmare. The raven haired man felt he ought to be angry, the boy was obviously talking about Kenobi, but in this entire situation, he couldn't help but feel some sympathy to the boy. Kenobi was probably like a father figure to him, and he knew what it was like to lose one. Though Qui-Gon wasn't dead - back in his own time - he no longer wanted anything to do with Xanatos, he had Kenobi to be his new son. Under Xanatos' touch, Luke seemed to calm down a bit, his face still in fear but his body no longer shaking.

"Shh," he whispered, "It's alright, Luke. I'm here."

Obviously the head injury had caused Luke to go into a state of nightmare, and Xanatos was unsure if he'd even wake up. It wasn't unheard of for a Jedi to become lost within the Force, to never come out of their meditations - but this wasn't meditation. He would wake up, wouldn't he? Just as the black haired one had considered running for a medic, Luke's hand closed tightly around his wrist, holding him close as his eyes shot open. At first, Xanatos felt so sorry for the boy, as he stared at him in fear, but as Luke's face became calmer, Xanatos felt there was no reason to feel sorry for him. Obviously he'd survive.

"Luke, are you alright?"

The blond nodded slightly, "I think so...what happened?"

"I hit you with my lightsaber, accidentally. You entered some sort of nightmare. You called to -"

"Ben..."

Xanatos nodded, "I really didn't mean to hurt you."

After the older man had screamed at him, and strangled him, Luke wasn't even sure to believe something like that, but he felt that it was true. The Force was telling him that it was the truth. The blond slowly began to set up, his head pounding as he did so. The injury clearly hurt more than he had anticipated, but he seemed to have survived, so there wasn't necessarily a problem. Throwing his legs over the side of the bed, Luke made to stand up, but instantly felt dizzy and began to sway. Xanatos had his arms around him before Luke could utter a sound, making sure he wouldn't fall - and it was then that they realized how close their faces were.

"Thanks for...catching me..."

"Think nothing of it."

Luke nodded, "You're not so mean as you make yourself out to be."

Instantly, Xanatos felt like countering that remark - he was a Dark Jedi, he was supposed to be 'mean'! Somehow, though, he felt that he couldn't...not to Luke, anyway. This boy was something special, and that was all Xanatos could think as his piercing blue eyes stared into similar blue eyes right before him. In that moment, he felt he was certain there was something about Luke...something about the both of them, something they needed to figure out and fast. He moved in closer, only partially conscious of what he was doing, and moved to kiss Luke before the blond lowered his head to rest on Xanatos' shoulder, as if holding it up was beginning to pain him.

"I should go soon..."

Although Xanatos hadn't wanted to hear those whispered words, he did, and a dropping feeling pooled in his stomach. Luke didn't want him, he already had someone to love. Moments later, Xanatos mentally shook himself - why should he care if Luke wanted him or not? He wasn't supposed to care for the boy, he was supposed to want the boy dead! Regardless, he knew he could not kill Luke, not even if he had tried his hardest to. The best he could do for himself to quash these feelings would be to keep away, and that was what he planned. Luke slowly pulled out of Xanatos' arms, where he was held, and moved toward the door.

"Thank you...for helping me, not for hurting me."

"Yeah," Xanatos whispered, "Now please...don't come back."


	5. Chapter Four

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took a little while to write this new chapter, I had one final exam and three tests this week, so it's basically been study, study, study! As well, I had to put together a half hour long presentation in Keynote/PowerPoint for a class...but now that I've completed all that, I can finally do a little more writing! Wootness for all.

"What the Hell is going on?"

Luke wasn't particularly stupid, he knew that Xanatos was avoiding him, hiding from him as long as he possibly could. It had been another week, and he'd only passed the man once or twice, barely getting a glimpse of him before he could disappear. He hadn't missed that fleeting look of anger and disappointment when he had left Xanatos' room the last time, and despite the fact that Xanatos spoke softly, Luke also heard what he had said. Never come back...Luke wasn't sure he could do that. For some reason, he felt drawn to the man, and it was a troubling thought, since he had threatened Luke as well as injured him - even if that was accidental.

"He's insane..."

"Luke," Wedge began, beside him, "Don't worry about him."

"That's easy for you to say."

The couple had climbed into their bed together, and cuddled as close as they could, Wedge's arm around Luke as the blond's arms were around his waist. The nights were even colder than the day on Hoth, and since the couple slept shirtless, they needed all the warmth they could create. Wedge was only slightly worried for his lover - although Luke seemed to let Xanatos into his thoughts more often than Wedge would like, he knew very well that Luke could care for himself. After all, the boy had managed to live through some of the most frightening battles the Alliance had taken part in, and with a smile on his face as well.

"Just get some sleep, alright? I'll be here to hold you all night."

The blond couldn't help but smile when Wedge said that, and held him slightly closer. He felt safest in the arms of his lover, not only safe from harm but from himself. Luke often worried that some day he would crack, and turn on himself and the world - obviously there had to be some way for the dark side of the Force to manifest within someone. Though he didn't really know why, he felt like it was in Xanatos, but he didn't want to risk asking him and perhaps having made a mistake. Not only that, but the man avoiding him made it difficult too. It wasn't long before Luke found himself drifting off, Wedge's arms still tightly around him and warming him.

/

" _What are you doing here?"_

_Having awaken in the cold snow of Hoth, Luke was standing across from Xanatos, a menacing look on the other's face, but one as determined on his own. Each was holding their lightsabers, and from anyone around - if there was anyone around - it would seem that perhaps they would begin to duel. Luke wasn't about to duel Xanatos, though, as he felt the man was the key he needed to discover more of the Force. The dark haired man felt similarly, he couldn't duel Luke because he felt the boy was the key he needed for whatever reason the Force had sent him there. Was he even in the future, as he had assumed? Or was he instead in a permanent dream state?_

" _I've come to ask you a couple questions."_

" _Such as?" Xanatos asked._

" _What are you doing to me? This isn't right, you know!"_

" _What am I doing to you?"_

_Luke barely knew what he was even asking about, though his dream self must have. It was then that he realized that his conscious brain had seemed into that of his dream self, that he was dreaming but thinking as he normally would. Of course, his dream self would not speak the thoughts of the real Luke, so he was doomed to only let this work out as it would. His hand suddenly let go of his lightsaber, letting it drop into the snow, as he began to step forward. The other man had begun to come closer too, though he still held onto his lightsaber, as if he didn't trust the blond. Gulping, Luke took a last step, standing only a metre away from his companion._

" _You know very well what you're doing to me. I can't let it continue, it's..."_

" _No, Luke. I don't know. Why don't you show me?"_

_Grabbing a first full of the black haired man's cloak, Luke pulled him close and pressed his lips to his. In his mind, Luke was screaming, but his dream self didn't seem to understand that. As Xanatos' lips parted through his newfound smile, Luke deepened the kiss trailing his tongue along the lips of his companion. The real Luke was shocked, repulsed, frightened, but also enjoying every second of this, all at once. Why would he be dreaming about kissing Xanatos, after all? Suddenly the other man seemed to drop his lightsaber also, and placed his both of his arms around Luke's neck, pulling the boy closer to him - as if that were possible._

" _Oh yeah," Xanatos said as he removed his lips momentarily, "This."_

_As the kiss deepened even more, their tongues battling for dominance, the two were unaware of approaching footsteps coming from behind Xanatos. The sound of a lightsaber snapping on caught the attention of the two, but before Xanatos could turn around, it had run straight through his midsection, causing him to elicit a loud scream. Luke screamed along with him, especially when he realized who was standing there. Xanatos wasn't making any noise any longer, his breathing had disappeared in a quick death, though Luke had barely noticed because he was staring ahead of him in a rage, feeling as if he could actually murder someone._

" _Why did you do that?"_

" _Because, Luke," the old voice of Ben Kenobi spoke, "He's a Dark Jedi, he doesn't deserve to live."_

/

"Luke! Luke! Are you alright? Speak to me!"

Shaking awake that moment, Luke had been unaware that he was screaming in his sleep. Wedge was looking down on him, worried of course, as the blond opened his eyes and brushed back his sweat soaked bangs. The dream was still vivid in his mind, and he was certainly frightened. Throwing himself forward, he clung to his lover for emotional support, though he would never dare tell Wedge what the dream was about. How could he explain to his lover making out with someone else, and then being devastated over their death? The blond didn't even realize he was crying until he felt his hot tears against Wedge's chest while moving.

"Luke, what did you dream about?" Wedge asked.

"I...I c-cant...don't ask...i-it's not..."

He stroked his lover's back, "It's alright, Luke. It's alright...I'm here for you."

"Never leave me, Wedge. Please? Never leave..."

Whatever he dreamed about must have shaken him pretty badly, if Luke was afraid that Wedge would leave him. Although Luke had always been one to have unexplainable nightmares, he had never reacted in such a way to a nightmare before. The brunette could only just hold his beloved, and kiss his head, unsure of what else to say to him. Little did either of them know that in another room somewhere within the Alliance base, a Dark Jedi was awakening from his sleep, also coated in sweat with a heartbeat going too fast to even count. Xanatos tried to breath slower, and closed his eyes, piercing his hands with his nails as his fists were held tight.

" _Fuck_...what the Hell was that about?"


End file.
